Chapter 7                                           Print

The Journey

My childhood was odd, and we lived in a house where dramatic and unpleasant things had happened.  I have a theory that events leave their mark on a house. The very atmosphere is affected by what has happened; the effect of the badness hangs around until lots of fun and laughter, and wonderful goodness has filled the room and replaced all the evil.

It was my misfortune that I had to sleep in a room with a bad atmosphere in it.  I was around ten or twelve years old and it was very difficult to get to sleep in that room.  At times, the moon shone through the window casting the shadow of poplar trees onto the wall, and the shadow swayed and contorted in a ghoulish fashion.  In those days, the clocks ticked, and the monotonous ticking was loud and clear.  The sound seemed to march around the bed from one side to the other and back again.  It was worse when the moon went behind the clouds because then there was blackness and the ticking clock.

I would snuggle down into the blankets and to keep my mind occupied I would concentrate on blackness.  In my concentration, I seemed to get into a very dark velvety blackness, and my hope was to go to sleep. What did happen was that I felt I was traveling through that blackness until, suddenly, I was walking with friends around a lake. The lake itself was not very large; I think there were about six of us walking and chatting to each other.

The conversation flowed, as it does with friends, and after a while I left the group as abruptly as I had entered it.  However, I did feel that I had joined the group as if I had often been part of the group, and I had a right to be there (we did not say hello or goodbye).  I always had some journey companions to travel through the blackness with me.  Once I arrived back in my own bed, I was relaxed and went to sleep.

I, and my journey companions, did this journey through blackness quite often, and joined my friends as we walked around the lake. The conversations were peaceful until one particular conversation urged me to speak out and make a statement.  The conversation was negative about humanity.  They were discussing the lamentable fact that people were simply not doing what is necessary to take their place in heaven.  The pathway is clear.  The code of conduct that people should live by is clear. It is the behaviours of living righteously i.e. doing the right thing in all situations, that gets you to heaven, plus the seeking of God's forgiveness when we sin, and then we get back to living righteously again. But people do not understand that it is as simple as that to get to heaven.  Also, some people would have a place in heaven, where there is eternal life, but when the light comes to them after death to take them to heaven, they don't go.  (As Jesus said "Those who love life lose it, Those who give up life for my sake gain eternal life.")  Follow the light at your life's end, Jesus will not lead you wrong.

I can remember my irritation at the conversation and I turned to them and said, "That's why I'm going back.  I volunteered to go back and tell them. They only need to be told.  When they know that God has prepared an eternal life that is dominated by His loving kindness and that heaven is there waiting for them who wish for an eternal life worth living, then I am sure they will choose to live in heaven."  I did go on telling them the same, in different words, as I stressed my point.  For some reason of all the things we conversed about, that was the only conversation that I remember.  I spent some time with my friends and then went back through the blackness to my bed and to sleep.  I continued to go back through the blackness to walk and talk with them, and each time we met, we resumed the walk from where I had left them the last time. 

The lake was not large.  It had a few trees around it but it was set in the desert and there were blue skies, (a very unusual sight for me who was used to cloudy England.)

When I first joined the group, we were a distance from but walking away from, a gathering of people, and there was a man baptizing people in the lake.  I didn't take much notice of it at that time but as we went around the lake, and the baptizing was ahead of me, I started to inquire about it.  I asked what was going on?  It was obvious that there was baptism but my friends were vague about it and discouraged any conversation about it.  I let the matter go.  But this time as I journeyed back to my home, the blackness was neatly arrayed with a three dimensional network of luminescent demons, suspended equidistant from each other as far as the eye could see.  All of them were facing one way and I was moving through the blackness behind them.  These luminescent demons were spaced too far apart to have much contact with each other. In fact they took no notice of each other and it now makes me wonder if they could see each other.  I passed up behind them and arrived back at my bed.

I went down a few more times and resumed my walk.  Now the luminescent demons were always there in the blackness and I got curious enough to want to take a look at them.  I stopped with my journey companions and moved forward to see them.  The few I saw were ugly men and women in badly fitted clothes, or rags.  Their faces were ugly but most of all they looked bored.  One turned to look at me with an expressionless stare; he then got back to looking in the same direction as everyone else.  I moved back to my companions and resumed my journey to what I now feel was part of heaven.

When we got to the lake, my friends and I walked a little bit and arrived at the beach where a group of people were being baptized.  There was a line up of people waiting for baptism.  Groups of friends waited on the beach and their companions, after a full immersion baptism, walked back to join them.  People were fully immersed but they did not seem to come out wet. Unfortunately, of all the baptisms I saw there was one man who was immersed and he did not come out like the rest.  He came out as thin as a skeleton but with skin on him.  He did not turn around and meet friends; he turned to the side, and walked off into the desert on his own. (If this baptism is a cleansing of all that is bad in us, then this man had very little left of himself to live in heaven after being cleansed.) Regardless of what I had seen, I joined the line up for baptism and other people joined the line behind me.  My friends and companions went into a panic.  They impressed on me that it was not yet time for me to do this.  Unfortunately I was a young stubborn girl, and I gave them a hard time, but eventually I came away with them.

As my companions brought me back through the three dimensional network of demons, we stopped part of the way up.  As I stood there, in the distance I could see a ball of light that seemed to be racing towards me.  As it sped nearer, I could see it was an ugly demon and it seemed to race straight at me in ferocious anger.  I was young but I had faced evil before.  I have found that it is better to show no fear and face the evil.  The demon missed me but another was on its way and I steeled myself to face that one.  The demons raced towards me in quick succession but I was quickly learning a sense of the time they would take to get to me, and resolved to turn around and find out what had happened to my journey companions. When I got a chance I turned around and took a look at my companions.  They were not around me as they usually were, but stood in a group a little way back.  They all wore monk like habits and cowls (large hoods) covering their face. I noticed that the demons that had sped past me were now locked in the network of demons.   I turned back to face the next demon speeding towards me.  I thought that I had to repel them or they might hurt me.  It was more work to strengthen my courage to face them again because I had used some of my time turning around.  The next chance I got I turned around and remonstrated with my companions asking them "What are you doing leaving me on my own.  It's getting hard out here" I think I said it a few more times and then I turned back to face the speeding demons. It seems that it had been my choice to go and look at the place where the demons were and it had to be my choice to leave it.

The next thing I knew I was back in my bed and quite honestly I had my fear in perspective, the moon casting shadows of trees on the wall was now quite pretty, and the clock ticking was not that bad.  I will not go back to heaven that way again.  I will wait and go the proper route after death.

I have had other dreams most of which I forget but this regular journey was not a dream.  I was awake before I went, and I was awake when I got back.  I also did not feel that my body and mind had been asleep while I was gone.  I always felt peaceful and slept when I got back.

I know what the journey means to me. The three dimensional network of demons is especially useful for me at this time because I feel that the 3-dimensional network is that place that in Jude 6 "God has assigned evil to wait for God's final eternal judgment." (See chapter 1.)  Obviously I could be wrong, but it seems to be a God like place to put them since they are not destroyed and yet are no trouble to anybody.  God is love. The demons will be judged in God's time. The demons that sped towards me were in fact speeding towards their allotted place that God has assigned them to await his eternal judgement, hence the added demons behind where I was standing. Although I was standing in the way of the direction the demons were taking to their assigned position, they were never meant to hit me their task was to move into the place that God had assigned them. I do not know who was sending them there but, although personally I know that the devil and those affiliated to him are reluctant to go at first, when they get going it is relentless and fast. They do not have a choice but to obey the command in the name of Jesus Christ the Son of God. And then they wait in that place for God's final judgement. (I have often been asked to explain the three dimensional network.  Imagine transparent building blocks and you build a wall up and to the sides and then thicken the wall out with more building blocks ahead of you.  At the intersection of the blocks at each of the corners demons are located. This will give a rectangular array of demons, i.e. a three dimensional array of demons.)

Since going on the journey I know what heaven is like.  I have been there.  The lake and the pathway was one location in heaven.  I know that there are many more locations in heaven and that they are all beautiful.  The conversation with my group of friends, lamenting the lack of direction people have in working their way to heaven, or walking towards the light when they die, is as true today as it was over forty years ago when I went on the journey.

All I can say is walk towards the light of God when you die.  Our God of mercy, compassion, justice and ineffable loving kindness is there to give you eternal life of peace and companionship with others, who have walked towards the light.

Copyright © Cheryl Shepherd - Canada

Matt 23:13
Mark 8:34-38

Matt 10:28
Deut 7:10

Deut 7:10